birthday, with love

Among the many "life lessons" they don't teach in college -- how to pay bills, how to not run up your credit card, how to make rent each month, how to give a great interview, how to gracefully survive a break up, how to dress designer without weekly visits to Saks, etc. -- is one that surpasses all the rest in navigational difficulty: how to make new best friends.

It seems elementary -- in Kindergarten, we shared legos; in middle school, we passed notes; in college, we held each others hair back and BAM! Friends were formed in an instant. After college, in the midst of figuring out all the "real world's" demands, most of us found ourselves alone and stumbling, missing our "BFF" college buddies who scattered in every direction after graduation.

The truth is, it's tough to make friends when you're a grown up. If your first job's office isn't full of "kids" your age, the options are pretty limited. I remember missing my girlfriends so much my first year in the city, that I saw a girl at the gym a few days in a row who matched my pace on the spinning bike and played over in my head how to ask her to see a movie or take a trip to Bloomies (I never actually did).

So it was to my absolute delight when I landed at a job a magazine where the majority of the staff was my age. They were even lovely people, and they liked drinking wine as much as I did (oh, DID they)! Even though I've now moved on and out of their glass tower, they are some of my favorite people and best girlfriends in New York.

Today was one of their birthday's, and I can't wait to let the wine flow and celebrate with her tomorrow. I thought this week about what I could give to show her how much I've appreciated her friendship. It's this lady's 11-month old son who has solely convinced me that I want kids eventually (most.darling.baby.ever.), and her love and support in the past year has meant the world to me. So, after considering standard birthday gifts like dangly earrings and Borders gift cards, I decided to do what I do best: cookies, with love.

I found this recipe on Saveur.com and even though I could have gone with something fabulously chic from Neiman Marcus, hopefully my cookie treats will wish this very lovely lady a happy day.

Happy Birthday, Melanie!

(p.s. there's a cute story about the name of the cookies here)

Neiman Marcus Cookies

First published in Saveur in Issue #97

2 sticks butter

1 cup sugar

1 cup packed light brown sugar

1 tsp. vanilla extract

2 eggs

2 1/2 cups oatmeal, processed in blender to a fine powder (such a cool idea for cookie texture! Love. It.)

2 cups flour

1 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp. baking soda

1/2 tsp. salt

2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

1 1/2 cups walnuts, chopped

4 oz. Hershey's chocolate, grated (I left this out)

Preheat oven to 375 F. Using an electric mixer, cream butter and sugars together in a large bowl until fluffy, about 3 minutes. Add vanilla and eggs and beat until combined, about 30 seconds. Add oatmeal, flour baking powder, baking soda, and salt and beat until combined, about 30 seconds. Stir in chocolate chips, walnuts, and chocolate.

Roll dough into 1 1/2" balls and place 2" apart on large baking sheets. Bake until light golden but still soft in the middle, 10-12 minutes. Transfer cookies to rack and let cool.

swirling happiness

This weekend I witnessed one of the sweetest things a person can (aside from childbirth, maybe). It's the moment when the double doors of the church open, the bride and her father square their shoulders and step forward down the aisle toward her future and her waiting groom. It's that moment when her eyes lift to his, when her smile widens into a grin she can't help but keep for the rest of her walk. It's her father's eyes watering, her feet fighting her heart's urge to run toward the alter, and the piercing stillness around her as we all look on - staring like Peeping Tom's into this private exchange between a couple in love.

I cry at this moment in the wedding every time. Every time. This year I cried at my friend Sarah's wedding, my friend Dave's wedding, even at two weddings where I didn't even know the bride. And this past weekend, I cried at my friend Elizabeth's wedding, because that moment is one of the sweetest and most pure I can think of.

I caught up on some magazine reading during my flight home from Cinci-tucky and Food & Wine's piece on favorite new dessert cookbooks stood out sweetly as a first kiss. The Nutella-Swirl Pound Cake was the winner (I blame growing up in Germany for my nutty sweet tooth), and after unpacking from the weekend, I pulled my standing mixer out for a little Sunday night baking.

I've struggled with pound cakes in the past - they're always too dry and crumbly or... too dry and crumbly. But this cake from Lauren Chattman's Cake Keeper Cakes popped out of the loaf pan easily and is perfectly moist and deliciously swirled with chocolately goodness. It might not be as sweet as Elizabeth and Kelby's first married kiss, but it will satisfy us single gal's in a pinch.

Nutella-Swirl Pound Cake

Cake Keeper Cakes by Lauren Chattman by way of Food & Wine

1 1/2 cups all purpose flour, plus more for dusting

4 large eggs, at room temperature

2 tsp. vanilla extract

3/4 tsp. baking powder

1/4 tsp. salt

2 sticks unsalted butter, softened

1 1/4 cups sugar

One 13-ounce jar Nutella

Preheat oven to 325 F. Lightly grease and flour a 9-by-5 inch loaf pan, tapping out any excess flour. In a glass measuring cup, lightly beat the eggs with the vanilla. In a medium bowl, whisk the 1 1/2 cups flour with the baking powder and salt.

In a large bowl, using a handheld mixer (I used my KitchenAid standing mixer with a paddle attachment), beat the butter with the sugar at medium-high speed until fluffy, about 3 minutes. With the mixer at medium-low speed, gradually beat in the egg mixture until fully incorporated. Add the flour mixture in 3 batches, beating at low speed between additions until just incorporated. Continue to beat for 30 seconds longer.

Spread one-third of the batter in the prepared pan, then spread half of the Nutella on top. Repeat with another third of the batter and the remaining Nutella. Top with the remaining batter. Lightly swirl the Nutella into the batter with a butter knife. Do not overmix (I was worried about overmixing, so I didn't swirl enough, make sure to get your swirl going!).

Bake the cake for about 1 hour and 15 minutes, until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Let the cake cool in the pan for 15 minutes. Invert the cake onto a wire rack, turn it right side up and let cool completely, about 2 hours. Cut the cake into slices and serve.

Note: Chattman recommends serving with coffee ice cream and I think that would be absolutely heavenly.

"to be awake is to be alive"

It's a double-edged sword to look at a calendar and realize that you have no free weekends for the next month. On one hand, you've got a lot going on, which means little boredom and even less time alone. But on the other hand, it means less time alone and even less time to breathe. This past weekend I was staring that busy calendar in the face, but it wasn't until the middle of a (brutal, but gorgeous... but still brutal) 10-mile mountain run at the Gunks when I (literally) couldn't catch my breath that I let the weight of my world sink in.

In the next bit I'll be in Los Angeles, Cincinnati, San Francisco, and Philadelphia, before settling into a couple slow days of slow food and good football in Pittsburgh for Thanksgiving. I'm excited for every part - can't wait to see old friends, spend some time on the "best coast," and get into my Mom's kitchen to mix our old family recipes with a few from my favorite November issues: Brussels Sprout Slaw with Mustard Dressing and Maple-Glazed Pecans from Bon Appetit; Bacon, Onion and Rye Bread Stuffing from Food & Wine; and Black Bottom Pecan Pie from Saveur. Mouth. Watering.

There's a lot to look forward to in the coming weeks, but stopping to breathe hard at Copes Lookout on Sunday snatched me back to the present (and my aching calves) and made me grateful for the quick upstate weekend getaway before the madness begins.

What I'm starting to realize about myself is that "packing it all in" isn't the key to happiness. At least not to mine. There's a truth to the saying "less is more" and it's going to be a 2010 resolution to manage my schedule a bit better. My boss actually schedules time on her work calendar for herself, so that no one can schedule into her own time to think, to work, to just be present... and I'm thinking it's a good model. We're just all so busy, and it seems that we're competing for a medal in "doing it all without having a nervous breakdown." The truth is, we all DO break down once in a while - whether in the form of a monthly pre-menstrual cry that my friend Ben is convinced all women have (he could be on to something), or a late night call to a best friend "just to vent," or a 10pm baking session that leads to pure disaster. Sometimes you just need those little moments to settle into yourself and remember to breathe.

So instead of sharing my stressful Monday night apple/carrot/raisin/total-disaster-in-a-loaf-pan, here are some images from my Thoreau-inspired weekend up state.

We went to Saugerties, NY in search of a Lighthouse I'd seen in a magazine.

We made it to here before the trail was covered by high tide, so we only got a peek.

We took in the last of the pretty fall leaves and breathed their wet, past-prime smell.

We stopped to take pictures of crimson red in the wet underbrush.

We went to Jenkins and Lueken Orchards for apple cider doughnuts and couldn't figure out what we'd do with these funny gourds.

We contemplated life, Walden Pond-style.

We ate delicious brussels sprouts for Halloween dinner that we didn't have to prepare for ourselves. (Thanks Shannon!)

And then we left it all behind at the end of the weekend to head back to the busy city life we know.

There, that was better than explaining why my carrot-apple bread ended up in the trash amid a heap of Monday night frustration. I'm back from LA/OH on Sunday, but until then -- please try to enjoy the serenity of fall's quick visit. It will be gone too soon, so make one of my many apple recipes before all you have left of my favorite season is a peck of gone-soft apples in the fridge.

bring on the beer

I had a boyfriend in high school who loved beer. He was Irish - fair skin, freckles, the whole nine - and I remember walking into a "guys-only" poker night at his parents house to 5 skinny, American Eagle-wearing high school dudes smoking cigars and slurping down beers of all kinds. We dated through most of college (he went to the big 10 university and I went to the tiny liberal arts college) and I remember hearing tales of home-brewing beer during holiday breaks and visits home.

I never understood his fascination and chalked it up to ancestry, since the beer of choice at my college was Natural Light in cans (if we were lucky, Coors Light kegs) which was choked down in pints for one purpose and one purpose only (and it wasn't because we enjoyed the taste). Senior year we traded our Natty for something much more refined and sophisticated: Franzia. We'd take our boxed wine to frat parties and challenge the boys to "Franzia-stands" in place of keg stands. You know, 'cause we were classy like that.

So I never caught on to my boyfriend's love of Guinness. I had no place for the bittersweet stout that friends claimed was more "like a meal" than a beer. Ummm I wasn't hungry, I wanted a drink! But "it tastes like chocolate!" Ummm I didn't want dessert, pass me my vodka/cranberry! It wasn't until I was studying abroad in England where the "Irish car bomb" shots flowed freely among my American friends that I came to appreciate Guinness (but only when accompanied by Bailey's Irish Cream and Jameson Irish Whiskey). With that shot, it really did taste like smooth, creamy chocolate, and we slurped them up at the Waterfront in Norwich like the American's we were in a foreign country.

Aside from the filling shot (and I haven't had one in years), I couldn't come up with a good use for Guinness until I saw Deb post about a chocolate stout cake. It's been on my radar for months but it wasn't until my office decided to throw a Halloween bash this week that I came up with a reason to make it. So I went to the store tonight, bought a pint of Guinness in a can (why does it have that weird ball inside the can at the bottom?) and got to it.

This cake is super easy to make, and since Deb warned that it made a lot of batter, I scooped some into a cupcake pan so that I could give it a try before serving it at the party. All I can say are two things: 1. yum, it makes an excellent dinner, and 2. I can't wait to eat more tomorrow at the office.

I used Deb's halved recipe and it actually looked just like hers, though to stay in the Halloween spirit I tossed a couple candy corn on top for decoration. After this cake I might be sold on using unusual ingredients to create fabulous versions of usual recipes (i.e. Guinness in chocolate cake). What's the next challenge?

Here's hoping the co-workers enjoy! Happy Halloween!

Chocolate Stout Cake

Bon Appetit

1 cup stout (I used Guinness)

1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter

3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder (preferably Dutch-process)

2 cups all purpose flour

2 cups sugar

1 1/2 tsp baking soda

3/4 tsp. salt

2 large eggs

2/3 cup sour cream

6 oz. semisweet chocolate chips

6 tbsp. heavy cream

3/4 tsp. instant coffee granules

Preheat oven to 350 F. Butter or spray a bundt pan well, making sure to get into all the nooks and crannies. Bring 1 cup stout and 1 cup butter to simmer in a heavy large saucepan over medium heat. Add cocoa powder and whisk until mixture is smooth. Cool slightly.

Whisk flour, sugar, baking soda, and salt in large bowl to blend. Using electric mixer, beat eggs and sour cream in another bowl to blend. Add stout-chocolate mixture to egg mixture and beat just to combine. Add flour mixture and beat briefly on slow speed. Using rubber spatula, fold batter until completely combined. Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake cake until tester inserted into center comes out clean, about 34 minutes (it took me 45 minutes, so watch the cake). Transfer cake to rack; cool completely in the pan.

For the ganache, melt the chocolate, heavy cream, and coffee granules in the top of a double broiler over simmering water until smooth and warm, stirring occasionally. Drizzle over the top of the cooled cake.